Let's just get your scores because really I can't with you: HALLOWEEN (WEEK 7)

IT'S HALLOWEEN NIGHT ON DANCING WITH THE STARS

Uggggghhhhhhhh blogging is so hard I can't just sit and enjoy the show or my life anymore. So much pressure writing and watching and watching and writing why have I burdened myself with this celebrity!!!! 

But it was a monster mash and there was a graveyard smash and a twirl and a snap honey yasss dance TWIRL dive turn work. 

Early recap particulars: Leah Remini was the fill-in host Part 2 and boy did she bring the goods this time. And no guest judge this week! Would've been a fitting week for Gary Busey to reappear and scare everyone with just a look. 

**SPOOKY AND SCARY COUPLES RECAPS FOR YOUR OOZING BRAINS**

Nick and Sharna

24 out of 30 

Beetlejuice: Nick is such a cry baby, which is a little bit of foreshadowing because he and his wife are having a baby! (found out post-show, but felt like it was germane to this conversation) (this is a conversation with myself) (Congrats also going out to Jason Mraz!). Anyway, he whined a lot about being an intense competitor as he is known to do. Oh and he and BSB did a concert! (Thanks Shade Room). Once again, smelled a whiff of slight shading of the Carter family when he said Halloween was one of the only times they made happy memories. AARON OH AARON
Why do you dance so scary: Their Halloween characters were Frankenstein and his bride in a spooky and eeeeriiie Argentine Tango. I'm drawing a blank on the story of Frankenstein. I know the "ex-wife" reference on Mean Girls but was Frankenstein scary? Need to brush up. 
Good, bad or ugly: I though he looked wickedly wack. I'm a Nick fan but that was a hot bubbly cauldron aka magic pot of mess. 

Emma and Hayes

26 out of 30 

Beetlejuice: Hayes, VINE STAR, is the most adorable gawky beautiful young ingenue I've ever seen. He should date Zendaya. He just wants to be great and nice what's so wrong with that people let the boy dance!!! 
Why do you dance so scary: Hayes played a romantic WEREWOLF, and in Bruno's words, he was the most romantic teen wolf since Jacob Black in Twilight. I guess I agree...? Trust fall from the Gods. 
Good, bad, or ugly: It was magical. Hayes is the next Derek Hough yeah I said it.  

Alexa and Mark

27 out of 30

Beetlejuice: Note to self, any person who follows a statement with "You know that, right?" has a flair for the dramatics beyond comprehension and belongs in an off broadway production of Spiderman. Enter Mark and Alexa getting cozzzzzyyyyy in rehearsal to comfort her shrinking self esteem. Somebody (Carlos) come get her! 
Why do you dance so scary: if Mark Ballas ever had an "element" to be in, it would be a Halloween themed dance. They did an Edward Scissorhands dance which I guess was supposed to be scary. And Carrie Ann gave herself props for INCORRECTLY using a Britney Spears lyric to reference last week's B Spears dance. My head was spinning. 
Good, bad, or ugly: What's a goon to a goblin.

Tamar and Val

24 out of 30

Beetlejuice: Tamar and Val were clicking which led to Tamar proclaiming:"Im probably the best dancer in the competition." She is the best dancer sometimes, what's wrong with being confident as Demi would say. 
Why do you dance so scary: Tamar and Val did a freaky deeky dutch boy dance to "People are Strange." A lot of people were scared on set this week, but none more than Julianne Hough who didn't give Tamar a critique without saying "sorry" twice before and after. Tamar's scary eyes fit the theme this week. 
Good, bad, or ugly: The most notable thing about this performance was Leah Remini getting scared live on air. Watch here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDvB0y-p5T8
TAMAR WAS NOT HERE FOR IT. 

That moment has inspired me to scare at least one person every hour at my Halloween party. 

Andy and Allison

 26 out of 30

Beetlejuice: Andy thinks he is a contender now lol. Ever heard of Nick Carter, Andrew? 
Why do you dance so scary: They danced to "Beautiful People" by Marilyn Manson aka the literal song of my nightmares and it "turned Julianne on". She was doing a lot on Monday. "Derek's racist sister?" as so_grool like to call her. 
Good, bad, or ugly: Snooze fest. Wake me up from the dead when September ends. 

#ThreatLevelMidnightFullLengthFeature let's get it trending 

Bindi and Derek

30 out of 30 (for those of you who are just joining us, Derek's third perfect score in a row) 

Beetlejuice: Derek knows exactly how to set-up the stories and this week's story was: Bindi, too sweet to be sour. Right before the dance started she hit us with the perfect lead-in quote "Never confuse kindness with weakness" HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE BINDI!!!! 
Why do you dance so scary: Derek and Bindi did an Argentine Tango as vampires. Nailed the theme obviously #ThatsSoHalloween 
Good, bad, or ugly:  I love this show, but I sometimes get distracted and half-watch the couples while typing and reading Kardashian updates. BUT HOLY MADNESS. Derek Hough. I watched this routine without breathing. HE CRACKED HER NECK. I really think they can win! And then to rub it in all of the other pros faces, Derek had the nerve to utter the words "I LOVE YOU" to Bindi and hearing him say the words... it was like my TV went into slow motion.  Then he shouted out Makeup Artists because Derek will not be defeated. 

Alek and Lindsay

25 out of 30

Beetlejuice: Alek was so BITTERRRRRRR at the judges. He is delusional about his dancing competency level, so they called in Artem straight off his motorcycle to tutor him. 
Why do you dance so scary: They had the nerve to butcher a Beyonce song. Don't remember what their Halloween characters were because I'm so off them as a couple. 
Good, bad, or ugly:  Lindsay on a hoverboard was kinda ite but everything else was BOOOORRRRRRRING.

Carlos and Witney

28 out of 30

Beetlejuice: Fun fact Carlos became the first dancer in the history of Dancing with the Stars to complain about being "overscored." Just trying to distance himself from the Pony choreography. 
Why do you dance so scary: Phantom of the Opera!! Witney's hair stole the show once again. 
Good, bad, or ugly: SO Fierce!!!! Carlos would be way better if he ditched the ball and chain aka his wife aka is it that serious aka if you wanna win my vote it is 

TEAM DANCES RECAP!!!! 

Give me a moment. 

They prefaced the team dances with the unbelievable statistic that Derek Hough has never ever lost a team dance. (Which everyone in my group chat already knew and what led me to go against my beliefs and pick Mark Ballas for high score but I digress.) If you have never seen a Derek Hough team dance then I don't know what you're doing with your life. 

From the moment the Captains were announced I knew we were screwed. Bindi and Nick were captains and because of Derek and Mark's tumultuous love/hate relationship, Derek always makes his partner choose Mark first. This was mistake #1, not only because now you have Mark on your team, but also because you have now pitted yourself against a team that has Val freaking Chmerkovsky. Mistake #2: Bindi picked Carlos and Witney over Andy and Sharna. Carlos is short. End of conversation. And then with the last pick, BINDI CHOSE ALEK OVER HAYES WHAT IS GOING ON.

I have a theory that Derek purposefully gave himself a weak team to either a) finally take the pressure off of himself to win the team dance and set up a nice comeback next year or b) take the loss on the team dance to anger his fans and set them into a voting frenzy for him and Bindi throughout the rest of the season.

Will we ever know???? 

#1 TEAM NIGHTMARE 

Such a stacked team. Tamar, Nick, Hayes and Andy. And Val and Allison are great group choreographers. Their concept was "monsters at dinner", with a sasquatch, Godzilla, King Kong, Loch Ness, goblin, ghoul and a zombie with no conscience. And the dance was actually flawless. I was mesmerized but terrified about Derek's group dance fate. 

Score to beat: 30 out of 30

#2 TEAM WHO YA GONNA CALL

So off. Wack as hell. I dont understand. 

Score: 28 out of 30 

And they lost and were like: 

ELIMINATION TIME!!! 

Now that Paula and Gary are gone, eliminations are so real. 

Couples in Jeopardy:
-Hayes and Emma
-Tamar and Val
-Alexa and Mark 

And the eliminated couple is: Hayes and Emma 

So you are going to tell me, that the week that Hayes called Emma his best friend, you are going to eliminate him? That's how you want to do this America?!?!? I can't even be mad I haven't voted all season what kind of hypocrite am I... I need some time to be alone with my thoughts..

Best of Group texts:  
"Evanescence is never a good idea"
"She prob thought it was David Miscavige" (Leah Remini getting scared by Sasha)
"Derek is a God sent from the dance heavens"
"Does Artem really wear leather regularly"

Other thots: 
All of the scares were so hilarious. The spider on Tamar was the best 
We got an elusive Tommy Chong reference which was pleasant 
I know it's on everyone's minds that Nick chose "Backstreets Back" way too early.
Is Beyonce really going on the lip syncing show? 
Can they do a Justin Bieber night pls 
Thanks for reading
Who made it this far
Code word is "EYEBALLS" if you did make it all the way to the end
Use of the code word will be revealed to you sometime in the near future

Can't wait for Halloween! 

Glee Hit it First - Brandy's Brother #FinallyFamous (Week 6)

Just when I thought I was done with blogging about Glee...

I dedicate this week's #WCW to myself for writing this blog despite a laundry list of things I need to do, but my fans are EVERYTHING to me so props to myself. 

WEEK 6 AND EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS!!! And by everyone I mean no one but my DWTS group text, but it's FAMOUS DANCES week! Not as catchy as one would like, but the premise was that each pro and star re-created an iconic dance that only musical/award-show lovers or GLEEKS would recognize. 

GLEE the television show, ever heard of it? Well if you haven't then I don't know how you found yourself reading this blog. It turns out that Glee and Dancing with the Stars have similar taste in performance numbers (or it's more likely that Glee just did way too many) so we are going to play a little game of GLEE OR DWTS but the fun part is that no one gets to play but me and I always win. 

I'm still waiting for someone to explain to me why Olivia Newton John was guest judge. For a dollar name a woman. Maybe it was Erin Andrews's job to explain ONJ's presence so she will let us know next week. 

Lets go back, back to the beginning...

HAYES & EMMA

"You’re the one that I want" from Grease

32 out of 40 points

Obstacles to overcome: Channelling Scientologist and High Thetan John Travolta and learning the plot of Grease.

Highlight of the dance: Wait backwards roll into handstand? 

How I feel: The shocking realization that there is a human on this earth who hasn't seen GREASE really threw me off my game. 

Judges comments: Olivia newton called him a Baby John???? Don’t wish that on him. BRUNO SAID SPLICE THE BEAT YASSSSS SPLIT THE ATOM 

How it compared to the Glee performance: I mean come on this isn't even fair. Every cast member was in this number, FLASHBACK effect to season 1 when Finn and Rachel first met. One point for Glee. 

Andy and Allison 

"Good morning" from Singing in the Rain

40 out of 40 points 

Obstacles to overcome: Andy trying to outdance Gene Kelly, Allison's feet might be swelling, etc. 

Highlight of the dance: So many props!!! I've never seen Singing in the Rain (wooops not very qualified to write this blog right) so I thought the whole thing was so fetch. 

How I feel: GO ANDY!!! Never thought he had it in him. 

Judges comments: Perfect scores so you can imagine. 

How it compared to the Glee performance: This was when Glee was going through its "Gwyneth" phase which was none too pleasing to this blogger. And a duet with Mr. Shue?  Mr. Shue is the Mark Ballas of Glee. One for DWTS. 

Alexa and Mark

"I'm a Slave for you VMA Performance" by the Legendary Britney Spears 

30 out of 40 points 

Obstacles to overcome: So many. Alexa hates Mark. Mark looked like Ernie Morton. There was a snake brought out for no reason. What's practical what's logical? What the hell who cares? 

Highlight of the dance: Back-up dancers SLAAAAYYYYYYED. 

How I feel: How dare you damage Britney's legacy more than she already has? 

Judges comments: Julianne scolded Alexa for disrespecting a dance created during the "Height of Britney" #knowyourhistory

How it compared to the Glee performance: I mean.... Brittany S. Pierce vs. Alexa. Glee's got this one.

Derek and Bindi

"I've had the time of my life" from Dirty Dancing

40 out of 40 points 

Obstacles to overcome: THE LIFT! Derek has never been more nervous in all of his DWTS seasons! Lol @ Derek trying to convince us that he is Hercules after Pain and Panic took his strength lololol Derek why you always lying

Highlight of the dance: THE LIFT! Derek Hough was not going to let that lift fail he locked his arms out and held her for 25- 100 seconds. 

How I feel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ctp4vYcfjBM

Judges comments: My little star has gone supernova!!!! 

How it compared to the Glee performance: Even Quinn and Trouty Mouth's beautiful young love cannot compete with Derek Hough: The living and breathing Glee episode. 

And with that Derek gets 2 perfect scores 2 weeks in a row with 2 different partners

Paula and Louis

"Vogue VMA Performance" by Madonna 

24 out of 40 points 

Obstacles to overcome: Paula's general poor dancing ability and lack of filter. #teamhavinfun

Highlight of the dance: Not even a question those hot pants were strategic and they worked. 

How I feel: Where did they get all of these fabulous gay dancers? 

Judges comments: Tip-toed around the fact that they knew Paula was finished in this town

How it compared to the Glee performance: UGHHHHH COME ON THE POWER OF MADONNA SEASON 1 EPISODE when Kurt and Mercedes helped Sue overcome her insecurity about her short hair and really anything is better than Paula. GLEE! 

Carlos and Witney

"Pony" by Ginuwine from Magic Mike which is apparently a "famous dance" now

38 out of 40 points

Obstacles to overcome: Carlos is afraid of unholy thrusting in other words he doesn't want to lose all of the Jesus fans that he just won over

Highlight of the dance: EVERYTHING. You can't go wrong with this choreography. 

How I feel: I died somewhere near the beginning https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SgAvehEDHYY Witney's hair I need those extensions for Halloween. 

Judges comments: "I think maybe you missed your calling." #somebodycomegethim

How it compared to the Glee performance: Seeing as DWTS and Glee Historian Maggie had to remind that Pony was even performed on Glee, DWTS wins this round. 

Nick and Sharna

"You Should be Dancing" from Saturday Night Fever

39 out of 40

Obstacles to overcome: YET ANOTHER JOHN TRAVOLTA REFERENCE where is Adele Nazim I want justice. Straight out of Leah (Scientology deserter, suppressive person) Remini's mouth: I THINK YOU DID JOHN TRAVOLTA PROUD DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF LEAH REMINI THEY WILL SNATCH YOU WHILE YOU ARE LIVE ON THE AIR! 

Highlight of the dance:  Nick Carter Knee Drops, Not once, not twice but THREE TIMES 

How I feel: Hearing Sharna say SAMBA like a hillbilly over and over really threw off my groove and I think Nick did well but he is getting out-danced and it's scaring me. John Travolta just has me in a scared head space right now.

Judges comments: Can't remember. I started online shopping. Good scores though! 

How it compared to the Glee performance: Despite the Blaine toe touch (below) that I'm sure I mentioned in that week's blog, I'll give it to Nick and his knee drops. 

Alek and Lindsay 

"Jailhouse Rock" by Elvis

30 out of 40 points 

Obstacles to overcome: The classic boring pro + boring star dilemma 

Highlight of the dance: Did not watch this closely enough to have a highlight...my eyes were crossing out of boredom.

How I feel:  Elvis never went to jail let's be real

Judges comments: Carrie Ann Wants Alek to take private lessons from Artem a la me and Marky Mark back in 2011. Me and Maggie just ranted about how boring Artem is so Carrie Ann I disagree. 

How it compared to the Glee performance: Glee never did Jailhouse Rock but look at this body roll though 

Tamar and Val 40/40

"Rhythm Nation" by Janet Jackson

Obstacles to overcome: Tamar's bitterness! She was mad because the judges correctly assessed her horrible switch-up week performance with Louis. And she was sick. 

Highlight of the dance: PONYTAIL. All of it really. 

How I feel: Didn't think it was perfect but she gave us Janet!

Judges comments:  Tamar had them shaking in their boots! 

How it compared to the Glee performance: This Glee performance came about in a time when even the Glee writers stopped caring about what the songs had to do with the plot. Young Puckerman killed it but did not come strong with the ponytail game. DWTS & another one.

Couples Ranking: 

Derek and Bindi 40/40****

Tamar and Val 40/40**

Andy and Allison

Nick and Sharna**

Carlos and Witney

Hayes and Emma 32/40

Alexa and Mark 30/40

Alek and Lindsay 30/40

Paula and Louis 24/40

All of a sudden the bad people getting eliminated makes it harder for me to be funny...  "that was good lol..that was also good haha ...lmao another good one... 

Elimination Time!  Paula and Alexa were in the bottom and Alexa took it very hard because SHE KNOWS!!! Mark will drag you right to the bottom of the barrel 

But Paula is out and acted like she was glad she got eliminated GOOD RIDDANCE I hope you had the time of your life 

OUTSTANDING QUESTIONS: 

- What does "Julianne doing Grease" mean? So confusing

- Can I get a replay of Paula falling backwards during dress rehearsal

- Not a question but Keo in Hammer pants and Karina doing Flashdance was beyond 

- Is Emma is becoming my favorite pro? 
- Derek has been training himself on speed and agility his whole dancing career and I have just been worried about pizazz and hairography where did I go wrong

NEXT WEEK: HALLOWEEN! GROUP DANCES! 

The bar is so high... 

Switch Up Week and Gary Left Me Here with No Titles

WHAT OMG LAST WEEK WAS MY 50TH BLOG POST and nobody paid any attention. What's the procedure? 

GET READY FOR IT BECAUSE IT ALREADY HAPPENED TWO DAYS AGO IT IS SWITCH UP WEEK!!!!!

Hashtag Switchup Hashtag Love Triangles Hashtag Hoos Behind Door Number 1 Hashtag watch every female star walk into the studio hoping Derek is their new partner ###

I feel that the switch ups are either a) meticulously manipulated by the producers or b) actually "voted through twitter" yeah okay but all I know is that Mark got Paula Dean and Derek got Alexa and I received the news exactly like this: 

And OMG MAKSIM IS BACK!!!!!!!!! Apparently since he beat Derek one time his faith in the show is renewed and ABC needed their fix of BBB (Bad Boy of the Ballroom) so he came strutting back like the Mufasa he is. 

TIME IS MONEY SO HERE IS A RECAP OF EACH DANCE, TO THE TUNE OF 5ive.

Tamar and Louis 29/40

Tamar's Week 5 in 5 words: Ridiculous choreography. Running split doe. 

Switch up verdict: Big downgrade for Tamar. Louis can't handle the pressure and she got low scores and now he lives in fear that the Chmerkovsky Mafia is going to off him in his sleep. "I'm sorry, Val, I'm so sorry!" 

Advice from the real pro (me): Get Ty Ty in here immediately to teach Tamar how to smize. 

Hayes and Allison 30/40

Hayes's Week 5 in 5 words: Just can't wait 2B king. 

Switch up verdict: Going from Emma (Chip) to Allison (Mrs. Potts) was a downgrade for Hayes. 

Advice from the real pro (me): We gotta figure out how to win over the male judges for him. Maybe he should slip in a misogynistic line here and there like "Girls are bad at math" wink wink. Also, enough with the Vines! No fans of this show ever knew you for your Vine fame and we can't even download the Vine app on our phones due to lack of GB.

Paula and Mark 26/40

Paula's Week 5 in 5 words: "Paula, keep your dress down." 

Switch up verdict: SO MUCH SHADE THROWN AT MARK this week they did all my work for me. Mark was so bitter but Paula was scared of him because he is so "edgy." 

He can't help it he is just too edgy!!! 

Mark dropped his famous one-liner: "I'm gonna take some risks this week" and I guess those risks included giving himself an acting/speaking role and slapping Paula's bare butt cheeks. Despite all of the tomfoolery, Mark was still an upgrade for Paula, because the alternative is Louis van Amstel. She danced better than ever but it was still the worst. 

Advice from the real pro (me): Speaking directly to you now, Paula. Bow out gracefully. That is my advice. These titans of dance are going to crush you in the coming weeks... and I mean that literally because you can't just shuffle around during upcoming group numbers they will trample you! 

Is it just me: Or is there a feud between Maks and Mark? Maks' comment that the heavily produced number was typical of Mark was quite shady! You could cut the tension with a Brandon Warren knife. 

Ahhhh Danielle Staub how I miss you. 

LET US PAUSE TO GIVE CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE:  The lie detector test segment. 
Part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X3alRZxE_w
Part 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DM2gYar46Gw
Got at least 5 good laughs off that. 

Alek and Emma 29/40

Alek's Week 5 in 5 words: True love. Touched the butt. 

Switch up verdict: Didn't think it was possible but Emma made Alek interesting! They were so excited to be paired with each other!  This was Emma's first medium-aged partner and she took the opportunity to perform a sexy Rumba and it was really good! Well Emma was really good and then they fell in love on the dance floor and then Erin made it awkward.

Advice from the real pro (me): Alek should get better at dancing and then come talk to me. 

Bindi and Val 37/40

Bindi's Week 5 in 5 words: Animal Metaphors and Yellow Blouses. 

Switch up verdict: Derek would never allow his partner to be paired with any of these peasants runnin around the ballroom so Bindi ended up with the only acceptable choice: Valentin. I was bored with the dance but it was Bindi-cute and Val cracked a smile. I laughed out loud when Maks gave his brother a 10 and shrugged. #thickasthieves

Advice from the real pro (me): Two pieces of advice for Bindi: 1) You can't bring a snake into a dance studio if you are not going to follow up with a Slave 4 U tribute and 2) people will tire of your perfect outlook soon but shine bright shine far don't be shy you're a star where you live where you are be a star. 

Carlos and Lindsey 39/40 

Carlos's Week 5 in 5 words: No one ever cared ever. 

Switch up verdict: Lindsey is not a better partner than Witney, but for whatever reason she got Carlos his best scores. Witney was not amused. The dance was boring to me and they received a blasphemous score. But do you, Carlos. Did my ears hear correctly that Lindsey asked if the Dalai Lama was a pageant?

Advice from the real pro (me): Do not cross Witney ever again. 

Alexa and Derek 40/40

Alexa's Week 5 in 5 words: Never listen to Mark again. 

Switch up verdict: Imagine you are a normal-looking rapper from Brooklyn and you meet a stunning, talented and omnipotent Texan named Beyonce and get her to marry you. That is the level of upgrade Alexa was blessed with this week after what I'm sure was a week of her whole family tweeting #AlexaDerek nonstop. If Carlos was worried before he should really be sweating now. 

Anyway, it was the most successful switch-up because they got a perfect score. (Derek was the only perfect thing about that dance but anything putting Mark in his place works for me.) Kinda kidding because at this point I feel sorry for poor Marky Mark. 

Advice from the real pro (me): Alexa, the people have spoken. To get votes you must make Mark your mortal enemy. You know what to do. 

Andy and Sharna 36/40

Andy's Week 5 in 5 words: Big Balls and smelling farts. 

Switch up verdict: Great upgrade for Andy to get a pro who choreographs a dance that he can actually do well! Crazy. 

Advice from the real pro (me): Just be a better dancer! Is it that hard??? I like him though :-) 

Nick and Witney 35/40

Nick's Week 5 in 5 words: Wearing his big boy pants.

Switch up verdict: Didn't go as well as I thought it would which was such a freaking bummer!!!!! Witney really gave no cares and Nick was taking charge without any ballroom knowledge and the judges gave them bad comments and Nick was just like

NO ELIMINATION THIS WEEK! Which means next week will be so dramatic you do not want to miss this blog where you can read about breaking news 48 hours later! 

EVEN MORE THOTS ABOUT SWITCH UP WEEK: 

- Please try to imagine Gary Bussey in that opening number and all of the doors falling over like dominos 

-I feel a strong dislike between Maks and Julianne...

- I honestly want to know how many TamarLouis hashtags were out there (A job for DT Historian Maggie K.) 

- End of Time dance, going first, low scores, sounds familiar

- Erin Andrews hit us with the football reference once again to maintain her street cred 

- In case we needed another reason to make fun of Mark, he has "Patience" tattooed on his wrist

- WHY IS ABBY LEE THERE in the audience the day before she was indicted for fraud DWTS is so on brand

Best quotes from the group chat: 

"Holy shit the run into a split"

"That running split was everything and more!"

"I think I wore Julianne’s outfit once in a jazz dance"

"I sometimes appreciate her no shame approach"

"What man looks hot in a rhinestoned yellow top" (The answer is Val) 

"Derek is the best pro and Mark would have ruined that routine with face paint"

Next week:  Olivia Newton John? I don't get it... Grease-theme?? Please say yes? 

And a Glee reference made it into another blog! I win again.